By: Samantha Whitten (bio)
Furniture and Appliances Now
 

I am not an advocate of women’s rights. I do not feel, on the whole, that women are treated unfairly or are unjustly discriminated against. I do not feel that women are the same as men, nor that women should be treated the same as men. However, I do believe in basic human rights and respect. I believe in earning your position and constantly defending your right to keep it. I believe in the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have done unto you.

Two days ago I spoke with a man whom I had met once before. When he asked what I do for a living, I told him that I manage a rent-to-own store. His eyebrows went up: “You’re the manager?” I nodded. He leaned toward me with a conspiratorial smile, threw me a wink and said, “What’d you do to get that job?”

This morning I attempted to handle a service issue for a male customer who was having problems with the surround system on his home stereo. I told him exactly what the problem was, and exactly how to fix it. His reply was this: “Is there someone else I can talk to? Do you have a boss or somebody around there who can help me?” I let him talk to my assistant manager, who is male and cannot even program a VCR. I fed him the lines and he told the customer exactly the same thing I had told him. The customer followed the instructions given to him, and the problem was corrected. The customer was satisfied, and that’s what’s important. Right?...Wrong!

There is a bigger problem here. I have stated that I do not believe that women should be treated the same as men, and I shall not amend that statement. But I also believe in showing people respect until they show me that they don’t deserve it, men and women alike. When did such rudeness become acceptable? Do people really believe so firmly in the incompetence and immorality of women?

I am not someone who believes that the world should just hand me things. I rarely accept those few freebies that are placed before me. I work hard for the things I have, because I like to work hard and earn things for myself. That has nothing to do with my gender. I do not have to work any harder than a man of comparable intelligence and experience would have to work. I am not limited in my endeavors to grow and advance in my company because I am a woman.

In a corporate setting I believe that instances of discrimination or harassment against women are rare. I believe in the basic honesty and respect with which good people behave, and I believe that a person is good until he shows me otherwise. I believe that, with a few exceptions, good people succeed and bad people fail. In other words, there are few bad people who make it to the top.

Outside a business setting, things are different. Those people who are not constantly made privy to the great things women accomplish are not as open to the possibility that we do, in fact, know what we are talking about sometimes. These are the men who make a woman’s job harder, and who make a good man’s interaction with a woman more difficult.

If a woman feels oppressed, here is my suggestion: Get over it. If the problem is something you can change, you will change it if your drive to succeed is strong enough. If the problem is not under your control, either find a way around it or leave it alone. I will give you advice from the Marine Corps: Adapt and overcome. Do not enforce the beliefs of those people who are hurting you. If people think that women are incapable of hard work, it is because some woman complained about having to work so hard. If people believe that women are ignorant, it is because some woman did not feel it was important to take an aggressive approach to learning the things that are essential in her field. A woman who cannot set the clock on her VCR should not manage a store that sells electronics. No one cares if your roses won a prize. Did your store win an award? Now there’s an accomplishment.

Samantha is a Store Manager for Arkansas based Furniture and Appliances Now (FAN).